Spilling Beans

There. I've done it. With 78 days to go and M's reluctant ok, I've finally spilled the beans. I've managed to find a space to talk with each of my co-workers, and this email went out last night to friends and family who didn't already know:

Dear friends,

The last time I used this list it was to share the painful news of the loss of our daughters, Isobel and Jovita. Four years later, we still feel their absence every day.

But this year, I am overjoyed to tell you that we are expecting the birth of our son in just two and a half months! Big baby ____ is due March 31, 2013. Yes, we've taken a while to spill the beans....

As most of you know, our journey towards a family has been long, and anything but straightforward. We have a wonderful woman named _____ and her supportive family to thank for this gift. She is our gestational carrier (aka surrogate) and has been doing a rock solid job so far. We are really so happy to have _____, her husband and her own four children as part of our extended family now.

We’ll be traveling out to the Midwest in about two months for the birth, and then bringing BB_ home. We can’t wait for you to meet him.

Thank you for all of the love and patience you have given us. Thank you for your friendship as we struggled with our grief, and found happiness in our lives again. We are so excited to share this next piece of the journey with you.

Love,

m. and M.

So my inbox is a pretty steady stream of "OMG!!"s" and "Holy Shit!!!s this morning, along with some very sweet remarks about what kind of parents people think we will be. It's kind of fun.

Now, I'm not done yet, I still haven't gotten the word out to colleagues and volunteers I connect and work with, but most of them weren't really around for the long haul. I don't feel the same kind of obligation to them. They'll figure it out soon enough.

So, phew. That's done. And it is a nice weight removed. An elephant exposed. Look! There it is! Now we can talk about it!Baby! On the way! That's what we've been up to. That's what's new.

Now we just need to figure out how to assemble the crib. Gasp.