Monday, April 22, 2013

How Fast Can I Type This Post?

Says the lady living on borrowed (aka nap) time with a baby wrapped around her chest.

People, life is good. It is so fucking good. So, no matter what I say here, just know, we are living a dream. A serious dream. And even if D kept us up all night, we will tell not a soul. He is perfect.  That's our story. We're sticking to it. Life is nothing without him.

That being said, life is different with him. Hello understatement. Here's a little sampling of our daily routine (all times are approximate):

around 5 am - the baby stirreth. Food is called for. We comply.

6:30 am - baby and me pass out right about the time M gets up for work, gets ready, sits on couch wanting to cry because that's how much he doesn't want to leave us. If we can muster it, we get up and chill with dad for a little bit. Watch TV. Drink OJ.

7:30 am - M leaves. We are left to our own devices. When I'm lucky, D passes back out for a bit more. As do I. If I'm not, we hang out. We dance. We work through the grunts and cries. A few rounds of The Gas Dance* usually does the trick. On mornings where sleep isn't happening, I've found a pretty sweet spot on Comedy Central from 9-11 am: Daily Show>Colbert>Always Sunny>South Park. That works.

9 am - 5 pm - eating, sleeping, pooping, waking, crying (not really a cry, more like a yelp. its pretty adorable...for a while). Lather, rinse, repeat. Every day there is that inevitable moment: "Holy shit. How is it noon already?"

5 pm - Daddy's home! The evening begins. We may start dinner, or entertain visitors, or better yet, visitors bringing dinner. Getting the mail these days is also a treat.  (Seeing all of these beautiful cards and boxes of treats for D makes me so grateful there are so many people celebrating his arrival. but also makes me wince at how sucky M and me have been as friends and family members these last several years. Completely checked out as far as most life events. Sigh. Sorry.) On lovely days, we go for a walk along the river together, either in the snap-n-go stroller or the wrap.

Here's my favorite part:

stranger: OMG, what an awesome baby! How old is he?
us: almost 4 weeks old.
stranger (eying me up): whoa. you look GREAT!
me: Thanks!
M (after the stranger walks away): you DO look great, but are the skinny jeans really necessary?
me: hells. yes. Daddy.

How weird is it to refer to each other as "mommy" and "daddy" all the time and to ones self in third person. Mommy's washing you! Mommy sees you! Mommy smells your pooooo.....but like most non-native speakers, pronouns and abstracts are tough for babies and referencing each other in ways they understand is apparently strongly recommended. Huh. Who knew. I just thought my dad had a weird mom complex. I mean, I'm fairly certain he did, but that's another story.

On a good day, I may also do one or more of the following:
  • brush my teeth
  • make the bed
  • eat breakfast
  • throw in a load of laundry
  • write some thank you notes
  • check email/blogs
  • try to figure out our new high-deductible insurance, which, for the record SUUUCKS. Like, three syllable sucks. 
  • pump
Notice, shower is off the list. Bathing is overrated. IMHO. That's what weekends are for.

And oh the pumping. That is really the thing that is most often the most undoable. Simply because when D is down, I have a list of other priorities, like feeding and clothing myself. When D is up, he is up and demands undivided attention. As he should. I mean, have you seen him? He's a-frigging-dorable.

D hasn't "taken to the breast" yet. We try at least once a day. I could probably try harder. But you know, I'm ok with it. We have plenty of us time. Plenty of skin-to-skin and kangaroo care moments. (read: I'm running around topless all the time, yo!) If he doesn't want my boob, I'm not going to force it on him. Because that feels yucky to me. It just does. I don't like pushing him to do something he doesn't want, especially when it is so intimate in nature. Plus, it stings just a bit when your baby physically pushes you away, no? I'd rather take that time and cuddle and love, and feed him with a bottle. Fine.

About 10% of D's daily intake is breast milk. The rest is formula. My pal A heard those numbers and wondered, "dude, that's not a lot. Is it really worth all that work?"

Well, fair question. And for right now,  I'm saying yes. It is. It's worth sitting in the dark for a few moments, nursing (as it were) those few drops from my breasts to give to him. Because I can. Because it's giving him a few more nutrients. A little less constipation. A little part of me. A taste for curry. A love of garlic. A craving for vegetables. Its worth it for now, even if I can't give him as much as I'd like.

So that's where we are. That's how we roll. In a snap-n-go. ;-)

*Think white-girl hybrid salsa/meringue/cha cha cha/side sway to the music provided on the Music Choice Tropicales station, which appears to be D's standing fave.


Em said...

Lovely post. Reading it made me really happy. I'm so glad you are reveling in motherhood - the tough stuff, the easy stuff, all of it.

luna said...

love this so hard!

and yes, I get it. the pumping is just so hard. I did it while watching TV at night but it was so hard during the day. especially when they're sleeping on you. which is a win in itself, as long as you don't have too much else to do. that's why I loved the moby those first few months. you can really get around...

and it's hard to get them to the breast when the bottle is far more plentiful. but for those few moments of calming, of nutrients and bonding, I found it worth it too, for a while.

sounds like you are enjoying each other.

LJ said...

I did lots of skin to skin contact with both boys, it was perfect. And yep - I totally rocked the skinnies at BRU at around 4 weeks, oh and ran a marathon with the other at 4 weeks. OWN THAT SHIT, because girl, you wear it well!

So elated to see you so happy!

Monique said...

Love this post so much - enjoy those newborn snuggles.

Lori Lavender Luz said...

Big huge smile here.

"whoa. you look GREAT!" <== That was one of my favorite parts, too!

Yay for twice a week tooth brushing (well, maybe you are more efficient than I was).

tireegal68 said...

This is a fabulous post! You are really rocking it! I think you are doing awesome! And I totally get not forcing the boob. For all the reasons you state plus you can't force a baby to do anything he or she doesn't want to do, so it's a big waste of time! Skin to skin and being naked and pumping when you can is great. I've heard of babies that took their time to get to the boob but got there eventually. He's getting some of your good milk and lots of snuggles. When you get a bit stir crazy check out for local baby mama groups. I'm not sure you will find mamas of your ilk, but you will find company, a plan for some days and when D gets bigger he will have instant playmates. All my baby mama friends are younger then me, straight, most had no problems getting knocked up and staying that way, but I get something out of hanging with them and other parts of my life deal with the other parts of my mama hood. Most of them share similar parenting philosophies and that helps.

Heather said...

I agree with the others. I love everything about this.

Nadine said...

Sounds right on target, showers totally off the list and were a nice to have some what rare thing (I'm SOOOoo gross)
Love that your so happy.
And I agree about the whole boob thing - didn't do it with my guy either - especially when the girl had no issues. Also like I SAID BEFORE boy had about 10% bm if lucky, girl had hell of lot more. Girl always sick and has freaking asthma......
Do you ahve one of those crazy bras you can stick the pump in - loved it. Answered emails and pumped at the same time
so there.

Two Shorten the Road said...

You make the bed sometimes? Are you fucking kidding me? Way to ruin the curve for everyone else.


tracy white said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
tracy white said...

Just incredibly happy for you all.

Soupy said...

Ahh, I remember those days- my fave days ever. Lost in a blur of love. Enjoy every last second. I remember, I got addicted to Lifetime movies! (LOL)

JP said...

Love this!!

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