Saturday, September 20, 2008

As I wait for my ride...


Ridiculously quick update as I wait for my brother to come get me and dump me in the river (with my kayak, of course) cuz I got the doc's permission and it is glorious, last glimpse of summer kind of day:
  • 10 wks and 6 days and all is well.
  • Went to our first "real" ob appointment and was delighted that I forgot how much I loved my doctor. Before our foray into the world of REs, I had been seeing his wife (also an ace doc) simply because her schedule had coincided better with mine, but now I'm back with the man who always seems to be smiling and laughing. And I love that.
  • Like Calliope, was completely underwhelmed (but still thankful, very thankful) with the grainy quality of the non-vah-jay-jay scan. Was enough to see two little hearts pump-pumping away. There were rumours of hand waving but d*mn if I could decipher it. I guess the HD version of the seedlings at the RE has us spoiled.
  • Got all kinds of binders and booklets and pamphlets on pre-natal classes and free stuff (and hells yes, I signed up for it all. Bring on the free).
My thoughts on this: I know that many of us hold off on signing up for freebies, planning showers, thinking about the nursery even, because of previous disappointments and losses. Understanding that all, I have made the conscious decision to embrace my pregnancy and see it as completely normal and healthy until proven otherwise. My mantra: "If you can't imagine it, you can't create it." So I am busy imaging the little spitfire hellion revolutionaries that I cannot wait to bring into the world.

And I bought a hottie mommie t-shirt this week.

What!?!? It was on sale.

hubby is not so cavalier, but he is humoring me. I think once we finally hit 12 weeks and dispose of the needles and the gauze and the suppositories and pills it will feel a little safer to him to shout it to the world.

My entire office now knows and that's nice. Nice to not have to speak about things behind closed doors with one other co-worker. Nice to have a little (not a lot, mind you) of understanding if I work from home for an entire morning or need to sneak out of a meeting for food. (don't make me hungry. You won't. like. me. when I'm hungry.....)

That being said, work is still kicking my ass. One of my co-workers decided to "retire" just a few weeks before our largest event of the year (thanks, buddy). And even if I have found him to be for the most part not very helpful and perhaps wished for his departure more than once, I find the timing of this callous and selfish and it guarantees there will be even more work piled on those of us that remain and are already swamped. Sh*t.

But it means we are back to an all female office and right now, that feels right. I think in the midst of this economic craziness going on in the States and, in particular, our sector, our little non-profit office has embraced a kind of "what?? whaddya got? what makes you think we can't take it?" kind of attitude.

Oh wait, maybe that's just me.

6 comments:

Amy said...

I love your brazen approach to pregnancy. Maybe it's not brazen...maybe it's just appropriately expectant.

I haven't signed up for any freebies for fear of getting them after something goes terribly wrong. But maybe mine is the brazen attitude...my body is doing a miraculous thing; I should honor that.

~Hollie said...

I hope you enjoy your kayaking trip! Sounds like glorious fun! I also applaud you for embracing your pregnancy, even with reservations, and enjoying it. KUDOS to you GIRLFRIEND!!!

midlife mommy said...

Good for you! So many of us miss out truly enjoying pregnancy because of all that's come before. You are entitled, and I'm so glad that you are relishing it. Enjoy your trip!

calliope said...

totally love your attitude! It is one I am trying to embrace as well. I will say that the first day of NOT filling up a syringe with PIO is sincerely awesome x 10.

Fate's Granddaughter said...

I was met with a lot of reticence, but looking forward, picking names and expecting everything to work out (even when I didn't believe it myself) has been the only thing that got me through the first trimester.

Bracing yourself for the worst doesn't make it easier when if comes (believe me), so keep doing what you're doing. In my humble opinion, being positive is the best gift you can give your two little ones right now!

Leah said...

Hey I'm so excited for you! I know you are stressed....get a massage...stress is bad for you right now and effects the intelligence of your child. I'm sending you my thoughts and prayers!

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